The two teams play in the First and Fourth division. I made contact with some of the players who I thought would have questions and did my best to answer them quickly.
We did have one boy who was selected for the first team but wanted to stay with the second team because of social bonds he's forged with that group. The boys are only 13 years old so that's A-OK and he will be left alone.
I used to call everybody and have long conversations. Then I tried to personally meet with each person but that doesn't work because there is no office space or desk at the field. I tried letters but that was weak. What I've done the last few years is post a list on our team site. You have to understand and respect that parents love their children and don't want to see them hurt. When you have face-to-face meetings, parents try to soften the blow and ask for things such as "will you call him up?". Half the time the answer is no, but if you say that in front of the player, it's like they're getting released again. There is no need to kick somebody twice.
I am always ready to answer questions once the team list is posted. The "truth" seems to be the easiest way in dealing with players who did not get selected for their desired spots.
In 23 years I've been attacked three times and lost one friend for not selecting a player. Not surprisingly, all via email. I don't attack back and answer the specific questions asked. They can keep attacking but I will not give them the satisfaction of answering that bell. I leave their emotional outbursts out of the conversation and stick to core of the discussion, the player.
By this point in my life, I've been through about 45 tryouts as a coach and at least 30 as a parent of three males athlete sons. It doesn't get any easier. What makes it more difficult is I have a philosophical problem with tryouts at the young ages (See Jan 28). Of those 45 coached tryouts, 9 involved one of my sons which is tricky business.
I try to protect myself and the process by laying out dates and procedures in advance and I work hard to not deviate unless something unavoidable comes along (snow storm).
The day passed peacefully and another round of trials is in the history books. I have no problem facing any of the players when the tryouts are done.
